Because people don't want instantaneous reaction. They don't want "live-blogging." They want to hear your opinion just when they've begun to stop thinking about something forever. So here are a few brief, two-day-old thoughts on the "Globes":
--There's no way to put this delicately. What the heck has happened to Brendan Fraser's face? Have you seen that thing, either at the "Globes" or in the movie trailer with Harrison Ford? Yikes.
--My wife and I had a moment where we were sure that Mickey Rourke had screwed up the winner of best dramatic actress. Because he looked awfully confused up there, like maybe he couldn't read what he was supposed to read and just decided to make it up. And because Sandra Bullock? In "The Blind Side"? If you noticed, Bullock did something really smart when she got up to the stage: She took the envelope out of Rourke's hands and read it herself to be sure. I hope the producers learned a valuable lesson: Never leave a major award solely in Mickey Rourke's hands. How amazing would it be if the producers had to take away an actor's award after he or she had given an emotional speech because of a mistake reading the envelope?
--Congrats to Christoph Waltz, who was phenomenal in "Inglourious Basterds," and sorry you got played off the stage while you were still explicating your elaborate solar system analogy for your role in the movie. That's just how we do it in the States, baby.
--Congrats and best wishes to Michael C. Hall, who was great in "Six Feet Under" and is terrific in "Dexter." I'm psyched to watch Season 4, and if anyone spoils it for me I will track you down, stick a needle in your neck and dismember you.