Hornswaggler | The culture, the humor, a bit of the sports, not so much the politics, and the workplace distraction

Hornswaggle is an alternate spelling of hornswoggle, an archaic word that means to bamboozle or hoodwink. I take my pronunciation from the late Harvey Korman in "Blazing Saddles" --

"I want rustlers, cutthroats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, conmen, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswagglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass kickers, shit kickers and Methodists!"

Hornswaggler
Culture, Humor, Sports
Workplace Distraction

Thursday, July 20, 2006

CNN and Anderson Cooper

I'm not getting enough Anderson Cooper from CNN's Middle East coverage. I'm getting a lot, but I need more. I think CNN should turn Cooper's coverage from Israel-Lebanon into a kind of reality show, one that depicts not just the brutality of war but what happens when the lights go off and Anderson Cooper has time to just be Anderson Cooper.

This behind-the-scenes show would focus less on the incredible toll the war is taking on Lebanese civilians and more on the toll their toll is taking on Anderson Cooper. Cooper has a wide variety of facial expressions that register his genuine reactions to the pain and suffering inflicted on innocent people, but I think he has a few more in the bag.

If you want to know how Anderson Cooper manages to get by on a tough assignment, this show would be for you. What's he having for breakfast? Can he get fresh melon over there? What happens when he runs out of personal grooming products and has to improvise? Find out all about the special cream Cooper uses to smooth out the worry lines on his forehead and around his eyes, wrinkles stamped devastatingly on his brow by the ravages of war.

Maybe it's just me, but 360 degrees of Anderson Cooper is not enough. I need at least 900.

.: posted by hornswaggler 10:52 AM


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