Hornswaggler | The culture, the humor, a bit of the sports, not so much the politics, and the workplace distraction

Hornswaggle is an alternate spelling of hornswoggle, an archaic word that means to bamboozle or hoodwink. I take my pronunciation from the late Harvey Korman in "Blazing Saddles" --

"I want rustlers, cutthroats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, conmen, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswagglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass kickers, shit kickers and Methodists!"

Culture, Humor, Sports
Workplace Distraction

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

'80s hits

Eddie Money is playing the San Mateo County Fair here on the San Francisco Peninsula, and it got me thinking about one of his crappy songs, "Take Me Home Tonight."

You remember the chorus: "Take me home tonight! I don't wanna let you go till you see the light!"

In other words, Eddie Money is coming to your place. You won't be crashing at his pad. Eddie Money may not even have a pad. And when you wake up in the morning, Eddie Money will be rummaging through your fridge, making himself some leftovers. If it's a weekday, Eddie Money's gonna ask for the spare key when you leave for work, because his gig's not till 7 and he might want to run out for some coffee or something.

If you don't like this plan, Eddie Money will hold you captive until you "see the light." Because Eddie Money is a disturbed individual:

I get frightened in all this darkness
I get nightmares
I hate to sleep alone

You see, with "all the power you're releasing, it isn't safe to walk the city streets alone." You know why, don't you? Because Eddie Money is lurking in the doorway of an abandoned building, "anticipation" coursing through his body.

It's a wonder Eddie Money has managed all these years to avoid paying for his crimes.

.: posted by hornswaggler 8:44 AM

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